I remember some one mentioned my name somewhere on Facebook asking for my thought about the below relationship storm confronting Kunle and Mabel
“I don’t feel like I’m the right man for you. I’ve been unable to meet your financial needs and that makes me feel handicapped. Anytime, you talk about your financial challenges and I’m unable to help, I feel so downcast. Please I need some time to sought myself out.”
Those were Kunle’s words to Mabel, his fiancee of eight months.
“Sonia, I don’t know what to think right now. My heart bleeds. I love Kunle and he knows that. I don’t care much about his financial status. I was ready to grow with him.
He complained of feeling downcast whenever I told him of my financial needs. The truth is, I just wanted a shoulder to share my burdens with and a listening ear to hear my plight. I was not really expecting him to always give me money even though I wouldn’t have rejected if he had done so.”
These were Mabel’s words to her friend Sonia
I’ll tell you what I think.
My heart goes for you in a period like this. I feel your pain, I perceive your frustration but more importantly is that I marvel at your ignorance.
Allow me teach you wisdom
Many staunch conversationalist have put up discussions buttressing the fact that true love doesn’t mind financial status. While this is true, it is also important to know that though love is not all about money but money sure creates an atmosphere for true love to thrive unhindered.
I understand that men by default were created to be protectors and provider and may be I know that feeling that comes with not been able to provide for the lady you love but then the apex of Love is sacrifice.
You seriously want to walk out of your eight months relationship simply because you feel you ain’t currently meeting Mabel’s financial needs. Gosh! I’m a bit surprised. Isn’t eight months too small to write God off?
Are you trying to say beyond the value of your pay cheque and the size of your pocket there is nothing more you can offer in a relationship?
I opened my heart to your words and then I saw a man with so much pride and ego.
Just because there’s no much money now, you decided to write an entrance examination into the University of BREAK UP?
That pretty explain that when there is plenty of money, you will want to boss Mabel in a little corner and prevent her life’s purpose from finding expression because in your head you have been conditioned to think that money is all you need to nurture, protect, lead and guide her.
I will tell my sister to consider a man with money but more importantly is that I will advice her to marry a man whose wealth is a product of his vision.
Kunle I advice you practice reflective listening. Listen to understand her challenges and the true state of her heart and do not always listen to see your inadequacies in her life.
Sometimes when she say “Hey dude, this my hair is over due oh! It doesn’t look good on me anymore and I don’t have money to fix it”
She understands you do not have money but she wish you could get ozone relaxer, search around for comb, have her sit by your legs while there’s water been heated somewhere then carefully apply the relaxer on her hair and help her retouch it, apply gel afterwards and get hair Parker to tweak a very good style for her.
Then with positive affirmations she need you to look her in the eyes and tell her “Hey babe, I might not be able to get you Brazilian hair today but in the days to come I will not just take you to Brazil to fix your hair but build an empire where you alone will be the empress that lives in it.”
You see ladies like Mabel are smart, they know money is vanity and what is money today might not be money tomorrow yet they still need it.
They have got the eyes of an eagle, while you are worried about today, they are seeing the mighty things you will be doing tomorrow hence thy seek your vision and company even before your cash.
You seriously want to take out time to sort yourself… Smile. Wait a minute! Haven’t you been trying to sort yourself out all alone before? What did you achieve?
Did WISDOM not teach you that one will chase a thousand and two will put ten thousand to flight.
Kunle I pray you receive sense.
On a better day, I will write a letter to Mabel. She too have got work to do.